All of life’s problems don’t really go away when you retire. At least, not the way people said they would (also—who said that? They didn’t know what they were talking about).

Sure, not having to go to work every day anymore is nice, but it’s lonely as hell. Maybe it even bores you a little. Getting sick of your partner yet? Itching to run away, travel alone, or drown your problems in bottles of fancy wine?

For most of my clients who are retired, life just doesn’t look the way they thought it would after retirement. It was supposed to be fun! Relaxing! There was supposed to be more time spent with family, kids, grandkids, and loved ones. What often ends up happening is a profound loss of identity as we shed our role in the working world, and many people struggle to find where they fit into the world now. Mentorship is sorely lacking in our country, and elders are not as respected as they once were, leaving generations of older adults feeling unappreciated and unable to share their hard-earned gifts with the modern world. This experience can be deeply isolating and profoundly sad. As adults continue to age, friends start getting sick and dying. The end of life years slowly become a heavy burden to bear, with death and sickness all around.

I help clients discover (or re-discover) a sense of meaning, direction, and purpose in a world that is increasingly obsessed with youth, novelty, sex, and productivity. I lean heavily on perspectives and wisdom from other cultures that seem to have done aging a little better than we have in the US to help my clients find some clarity about what aging well might look like for them. Does this sound intriguing to you? If so, I’d love to hear from you!